Most children don’t dream of growing up, meeting their soul mate, marrying their soul mate, and then having sex with other people/letting their spouse have sex with other people. In other words, most of us aren’t naturally predisposed to swinging.
Some argue that humans are predisposed to be promiscuous, and sleep with plenty of people. Some argue we’ve evolved to be monogamous. But few people agree we’re meant to be in some in-between area, where we’re both committed to one person and sleeping with plenty of others.
But that’s exactly what swinging is. So if our DNA, our upbringing, and our society don’t prompt the decision for a couple to become swingers, what does? You’ve probably wondered that when you’ve met swingers, or when married friends of yours have told you they’re going to start swinging.
Here are some of the top reasons people become swingers.
They don’t want to cheat or split up
Sometimes a couple realizes they both have a strong desire to experience other sexual partners, but not for lack of loving each other or still wanting to have sex with each other. They don’t want to have to split up because they sleep with other people, and they don’t want to lie to each other about it, either.
If one or both people are bisexual, then the only way they can really be satisfied is by swinging. Some would say it’s unfair for a person who is bisexual to be limited to only sleeping with one gender their entire life. And in many couples, a person doesn’t consider it cheating if their partner is sleeping with a person whose gender is different than their own.
Their sex life is dead, but their bond is not
Some couples just lose the flame, but are still best friends who care deeply about each other, lead a very satisfying life together, and feel very connected on other levels. They don’t see why they should have to miss out on the sexual side of life, nor do they want to break up, so they swing.
Swinging can be a huge thrill for voyeuristic individuals or individuals with sexual fantasies that involve more than two people. These couples may not swing regularly, but occasionally, as a way of fulfilling certain fantasies.
To promote jealousy/competition
Some couples need a certain level of jealousy and competition to feel aroused. Swinging provides this but within safe and clear boundaries. They get the thrill of feeling jealous, without the anger that can come with being cheated on.